i’m mad i’m so mad i’m so mad i’m mad
i’m sad i’m mad that i’m sad
i’m mad that i’m sad i’m mad that i’m sad
i’m mad that i care i’m mad that i care that i let myself care again
i’m mad i’m mad i showed my cards i’m mad
mad at myself for who iam i’m ad at my myself for who iam
i’m mad for caring
i’m sad no one cares i’m sad i’m alone
no matter what i’m alone and no one will ever fill it
i’m mad i feel left out im mad my wife loves someone else
more than me
i’m mad i care i’m mad i care i’m mad i put this much attention to it
i’m mad that i’m sad
i’m so mad at myself for feeling das
sad
for insecure and lonely
and
needy
i’m needy i’m sensitive
i’m lonely
i can’ believe i care
i can’t believe i care i’m mad i care i’m mad i care
i’m mad i let it happen again
when living here was so clean
and easy and now its messed up again
and i’m having to do shit i don’t have
want tod oand i know i know i never have to i
i know i know i know i ‘m looking for reasons to get mad
i know i’m fixagint i know
i kow i’m fixating
i kow
i know
i want to feel good i want to feel good
i wat to feel at ease i wat to feel
i want to feel the truth i want to feel the truth
i want to feel the truth i want to feel the truth
i know i don’t want to feel this way i know i don’t want to feel this way
i kno i know i know the
secret to life i know the secret to life and
can elax
relax in the knowledget that the activity of divine abundance is
eternally operating in my life
i simply have to be ware of the flow
the radiation of creative energy
which is continuoulsy
easily and effortlessly pouring froth from my divine consciousness
i am now aware i am now in the flow
i hate myself i hate that i’m like this i hate that i dont know how to sotp
i hate
being the one simping i hate being the one who cares
i hate the excuses
i hate the bullshit i hate the lack of integrity
i hate how far up somoene else’s ass youa r
you are
i hate the lies i hate the bullshit i hate
what isn’t being said
i hate that i care i hate that i’m looking i hate that i’m
not on top
i hate that i’m not on tpo
and i’m
i’m looking for others to blame
i hate
losing my pwoer i hate giving it warey
i hate that i giave it ware
that i ekep doing it that i ca
keep letting myself care but i guesst hat’s the work
that’s the work
noticing that i’m caring again that i’m doing it again
but she’s getting it all and i’m getting nothing
she’s getting it call and i’m getting
gaining nothing
nothing to gain i nve absolutely nothing to gain
the work works the wa
awareness works the awreness works the journaling works the honesty works the
feeling the
feeling the feelings works feeling the wfeelings works i’m
still mad but not as mad mad at
????
and then llolooking for easons
must be this
mad then th
not focused and then
the mind eats the first negative thing that coes in
into its vibraiton and i know tis up to me whr ei focus
and what i crate
tha
that is all there is the version i create the version i create
and i take the imt e
time to feel good nwo i ta
i take the ime tithe
the time to feel good now i take the time to feel godo nwo i
i take the tim to create the version i prefer
the work always works and tomorrow iw ant to wake up happy
tomororw i willwak
i will wake up happy and focused and i nthe flow
tomoorow i will focus
wake up focused within i will wake up in the flow
tomorrow iwill i w
will wake upas as god iw
i will go to sleep feeling the feeling
but as soon as i start thinking about it again
i get supper pissed like damn
give me a fucking chance jesus fucking christ racing to it like a fucking
teenager like fuck at least give me the change to
chance to do something but now
you fucking race to it like a fucking youngest child
like a fat kid trying to get the last piece of cake
like a fucking dog going for a treat
maybe if i get mad enough about it can
i can let it pass because i dont want to wake up
to a fight
i want to love i want to be happy
i want to want to love iw ant to want to love
to let go
why am i so mad why am i so mad
because you’re hogging it and not even thinking about me
you’re hogging it you’re taking all of it and nothing leaving any for me
you’re taking away from me you’re taking something from me
you’re taking something from me
lack
lack mindset lack mindset
patheticc maindset
for real
who wants to be around that no one and that is not the perosn i am
that’s not how i’m trying to live
that’s not how i’m trying to live
i now
i know this i nwo thia
i know this i’m
not going to let it happen gin
i’m not going to let it happen again
i am now aware i am now in he flow
i am now awre ia m now in he flow